Experiencing common humanity

You’re not alone. You won’t be judged. Your presence and contributions matter.

My hope for Community Time is to have that impact on you. Common humanity happens when you are vulnerable enough to share what you experience and it resonates with others. They experience the same thing or a version of the same thing. They have thought what you think and have felt what you’ve felt.

Common humanity reminds us that we are all connected. Where trauma, including the trauma of experiencing mental illness, makes us feel alone and disconnected, common humanity pulls us back into connection.

You may have felt so much judgment about the status of your mental health. Your friends and family may not understand. Your treatment team might have expectations of you. You, yourself, may feel frustrated, demoralized, and ashamed of your symptoms. When you meet other people who have suffered like you, you will come to understand that anxiety, OCD, and mood disorders are chronic, episodic illnesses that have ups and downs based on your biological vulnerabilities, the ways you think and act, and changes in your social environment. It's complex. You don’t have control over what shows up in your experience. You have some control, but not full control, over how you respond. When you meet others who are courageously facing their symptoms every day, you’ll come to see that coping with mental illness requires a long-term strategy of compassion, courage, and especially humor.

Common humanity can also remind you that you are part of the world around you. You being you, you showing up and contributing: it matters to other people. I hope you matter to you. Mental illness can be so demoralizing that you can stop caring about yourself, you can withdraw and start to believe that no one cares about you and how you act doesn’t matter. Your depression can blind you to the reality that everyone is connected to everyone else broadly speaking and that who you are and how you act influence the particular lives to which you are connected. Community Time can give you a chance to connect with other people, to share how you’ve coped well and where you still struggle. Your descriptions and insights will influence other people. What you say and how you say it changes the way other people experience themselves and thereby changes their lives.

Showing up to Community Time and opening yourself up to common humanity takes courage. There’s always a chance that what you say will get a response that is painful to you in some way. I do my best to make Community Time as safe as possible, and also, we can’t control what you’re going to think and feel.

A commitment to Community Time is a commitment to attending to the social aspects of your mental illness, especially the part that makes you feel alone, judged, and unimportant to others. Because of your biological and psychological vulnerabilities, you may continue to suffer, but at least you can find hope and courage knowing you are not alone.